This Holidays

Writen by June Carr

Is it possible in this day and age to have an idealic Christmas? Is there truth in the song "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year".

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
With the kids jingle belling
And everyone telling you "Be of good cheer"
It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
It's the hap -happiest season of all
With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings
When friends come to call
It's the hap - happiest season of all

It's not only possible, but easily attainable if you'll follow a few tidbits of advice from someone who used to be caught up in the commercialism of the holidays.

Have you heard of the "Butterfly Effect"? Basically it says that a small change in one place can have a large change somewhere else. This sounds simple, but I like to interpret it this way; a random act of kindness may result in that person's life affecting another life, somewhere, sometime along life's journey.

As you look around you, it's impossible to know the inner thoughts of those near us. Some may appear happy, while inside they are experiencing sorrow; another may feel lonely, even though they are surrounded by the masses. Another in financial distress, wondering how they can possibly get to the end of the month, let alone have a good Christmas.

While it's not possible to help everyone, Christmas is a time when we can reach out to others; not necessarily with expensive gifts, perhaps a note, phone call, email, letting someone know we still remember them and wish them well. If the person who catches your eye is a stranger, give them a smile, it's a small touch of kindness that will brighten their day. How can you know for certain you've had a positive effect? Throw a pebble into a pond, then turn your back and walk away; did the ripples reach the surrounding shore? You may be certain they did, just as your actions are ripples in the life of those you meet and pass on the street.

The same holds true for you, find joy in the simple things of the season. Watch your children or grandchildren as they experience (some for the first time) the wonderment of the holiday season. A simple cup of coffee with a friend reminiscing about old times can gladden your heart.

One of my fondest Christmas memories was many years ago with my mom and dad; we didn't have much money, but we were together and enjoyed the season. We took the time to decorate our simple home and bring Christmas inside. They were simple decorations, greeting cards, candles, bright colorful scarves; but love was in each one.

We had a small Christmas tree, chosen together at a nearby Christmas tree farm. I can still see our frosty breath as we looked for the perfect tree.

We didn't focus on gifts, or how much money was being spent, just on the love and warmth that flowed from one to another. And while times were difficult, we focused on the good things, from the little (3 foot tall) Christmas tree, to the homemade presents under the tree.

I don't remember the gifts from that year; I do remember the overall feeling of warmth and togetherness. It wasn't about money; it was about love, respect and admiration.

That year with money tight, and presents scarce, the blessings flowed from one to another without restraint.

It seemed the happier we were, the happier those around us became, it was the "Butterfly Effect" in action. Think of this the next time you are feeling grumpy and tempted to act angry.

The reverse is also true, if someone is nice to you, even if a total stranger, echo those feelings, show appreciation for the fact they share and care about others, just as you do. If you have difficulty with this, work on it; decide to become a better more caring person as each day passes.

Spend time this Christmas with your family and friends. Don't be worried about gifts, the spirit of Christmas is sharing and caring. A good and caring relationship with a friend, family member or significant other is one of the true blessings of being alive, cherish it.